Characters

Not a Cat Lady

Supporting Characters

mother—the main character’s mother; a widow living alone in a large house; has recently announced her plan to move into a senior-living facility

Beth—the main character’s older sister; married, with three children (one of them adult and no longer living at home)

Alex—Beth’s son

Mike—the main character’s older brother; married, with one child

Ethan—Mike’s son

Stephanie—the main character’s closest friend; although they went to different schools, they knew each other during their high school years, then lost touch during college; they recently reconnected

Sandra—the main character’s closest friend at college; a flute player; a mother and part-time employee at a science-museum

Jeff—a close friend of the main character when they were in college; wrote for a small-town paper until it folded, now works in TV news in a mid-sized city

Daisy—a close friend of the main character when they were in college; once liked to be called “sassy”; a CPA

Jack—a close friend of the main character when they were in college; wanted to start an internet business, now works for a lawn-care company

Ana—a friend of the main character when they were in high school; an exchange student from Honduras; a sophomore when the main character was a senior

Charlotte—a development editor at the publishing house the main character does most of her freelance work for, and her primary contact there

Keisha—a designer at the publishing house the main character does most of her freelance work for; dependable and skillful

Maggie—a development editor and team leader at the publishing house

Lauren—a production editor at the publishing house; has worked often with the main character; easy to get along with; constantly wearing a scarf

Leslie—someone who used to work at the publishing house; vivacious and positive

Jaia—a resident in the main character’s apartment building; a stay-at-home mother of two school-age children

Dr. Chapman—Diva’s veterinarian


The Flower People

The Flower People is a series of partially illustrated stories created by the main character of Not a Cat Lady, as she explains in chapters one and thirteen.

Iris—the leader of the bunch and the most outgoing. She is also the bravest—except for Lily, who is braver in doing unwise things that risk bodily harm. Iris is very vain about her looks, and can be kind of bossy, but she always has the bunch’s best interests at heart and makes sure no one is left out or ignored. She carries a staff that she says is for hiking, but she actually calls it a “thumping stick” and its main use seems to be smacking Gary Gator or the occasional giant snail.

Lily—the wild girl who lives in the woods and wears crudely stitched clothing. She’s clever, resourceful, and brave; she enjoys adventures, but isn’t quite as reckless as the other girls like to think. She’s perpetually tanned from spending most of her time outdoors. Lily loves to tease Azalea, but is really very fond of her. Lily frequently ends up rescuing Azalea from some dreaded (actually nonthreatening) fate.

Azalea concerned

Azalea—the good girl of the bunch. She is shocked by bad words or “roughhousing,” and she likes things neat and tidy. When put under great pressure she can admit that wearing your hat crooked is not really a moral failing. She never lectures or scolds when she sees improper behavior, however; she simply gets teary-eyed and pleads with the wrongdoer to change her ways.

Lilac—the kind, calm, sensible center of the bunch, but not the leader. Everyone says Iris is prettier, but secretly Lilac is the most beautiful of them all. Lilac is also the smartest girl, though Iris is more clever and creative in getting out of trouble.

Dandelion—the carefree (or careless) spirit of the bunch; not particularly attuned to reality. She is not actually stupid, just unconcerned about everything. She wouldn’t believe you if you told her the moon is an inflatable beach ball (Lily tried once), but if she went for a hike alone she might get lost and not even notice until her worried friends found her after hours of searching, and she’d be puzzled about why they were out of breath. She has a reputation for eating too many sugary sweets, but secretly she likes sour candy best. She is the tallest of the bunch.

Zinnia—zealous builder and fixer of practical things. Not part of the main bunch; she has a house a certain distance away from the village, but her obsessive jogging often brings her into the area. Zinnia loves to eliminate messiness and is thrilled at every chance to repair furniture, roof tiles, and any available housing fixtures. She has opened half of her house to her friend Blue Tulip, who rarely lets Zinnia clean anything on that side of the building.

Blue Tulip—a passionate, difficult painter, also not part of the main bunch. Shares a house with Zinnia. Tulip demands absolute solitude for an hour every morning while she gathers her energies and develops her ideas. She gets into creative fits in which she locks herself in her room and paints for hours without stopping for anything. She’s generally smeared with various colors of paint, and sometimes her shoes don’t match. Angrily denies that blue is not her natural hair color.

Zinnia and Tulip bicker a lot, but the house is split in two, which keeps them in separate spaces. Zinnia built the house and owns it. Zinnia is supposed to be allowed in Tulip’s half once a week to tidy up, but this rarely happens, as Tulip keeps getting caught up in artistic frenzies.

The kitchen, pantry, and dining room are on the elevated bridgeway connecting the two sides of the house. Zinnia and Tulip both hate cooking, so they fix breakfast and supper together (unless Tulip is locked in her room painting). Tulip eats lunch only if she’s in a deep inspirationless funk. When they visit the village together it is usually to enjoy good food at the diner, but amazingly they tend to be right on time for the start of an adventure.

Snapdragon—the bunch’s group pet. The girls in the village share the tasks of looking after him; the spikes on his back are about nose-high to them. He’s playful, curious, and friendly—he’s still young—but of course very strong and can be unintentionally dangerous in his enthusiasm. He hatched from an egg that rolled into the village years ago, and the girls have no idea where it came from (except, obviously, from a female dragon). Rotten wood is his favorite food but he also loves cut grass that’s been left in wet piles overnight to get mushy. Snapdragon doesn’t breathe fire, he spouts water. He’s great for watering gardens.

Marigold—a newcomer to the village, not one of the original bunch. She is forceful, bossy, and snobbish. She thinks everything would be fine if the other girls would just realize she’s right about things. Marigold is difficult to live with, but Iris is determined to find something good about her.

CeeCee and Cecil—a kind, elderly bear couple who have retired from grizzly-ing (although CeeCee still maintains some of the disposition that went with the job). They do all the cooking at the village diner, which must close every winter when they hibernate.

Celia the Brat—granddaughter of CeeCee and Cecil. She doesn’t live in the village (fortunately) but sometimes comes to visit her grandparents. She enjoys taunting, destroying things, and being too fast to be caught.

The Mysterious Mossman—a very tall person covered in shaggy moss and fur-like grasses. The Mossman lives somewhere within the forest; even Lily can’t say where his home could be. (Though she thinks maybe he just drapes himself over any convenient tree branch.) The Cliff Beetles tell stories about the Mossman, but most of the girls in the village are convinced he’s only a myth. Rumors say he’s fond of rotten cabbages.

Gary Gator—the ineffective antagonist. Tends to forget he has dangerous teeth. He lives in Sulky Swamp downriver from the bunch’s village, eating mainly fish; he remains embittered because no one makes fishing poles for alligators (reels always break in his claws). His schemes usually involve either eating someone or stealing something that will help him catch fish. He wears disguises that are painfully transparent, but the girls usually play along until they figure out what he’s up to. Gary is afraid of Snapdragon, who adores him.

The Mothster—a gigantic moth that lives deep in the forest or perhaps on a mountain. It is active only at night and emerges in the village when it runs short of food wherever it normally lives. It is fond of eating Dandelion’s roof. The girls in the bunch generally believe the Mothster is a myth, and explain the damage it causes as being the result of strong winds. It has a beak.

Giant Snails—an oozing menace from the depths of the forest. They don’t actually intend any harm, they’re simply plowing through on their way somewhere else. The plants in the girls’ gardens are too small for the snails to notice, so the main threat is that the creatures will indifferently crush whatever they encounter. They mostly follow the central path through the village, but one time Dandelion’s house was knocked over. Fortunately no more than three of the snails have ever been seen at once, and that may be the entire population—it’s hard to tell one snail from another and count individuals. Lilac thinks the snails are following some sort of seasonal migration pattern, but no one is inclined to follow them to find out where they’re going or why.